There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
