We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
it's like heaven, but drunker
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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