I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
