guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Be still, my beating vagina.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
