Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
