just tell him i said nine months
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
