Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
