I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Randomize
