I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
