do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
She even gives head with a lisp.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
