brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
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