My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Randomize
