my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
