i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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