can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
