i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize
