Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
