I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
