ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
