i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize