I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
Randomize
