Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
