He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
