i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
