Christians are straight up FREAKS
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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