Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
There r osticjed everywhere
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
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