4 words: hood of his car
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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