Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
We're too hungover to prance.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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