and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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