I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
