Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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