but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Randomize
