Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Randomize
