why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
