It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
i believe in u and ur pee
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
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