If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize
