went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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