Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
