you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
