well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
