Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
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