I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
