what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Did you finish that presentation yet?
No but don’t worry about it. I do my best work in the middle of the night. I’m like a hamster.
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