Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Floor bacon is actually really good
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
