how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Randomize
