Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
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