how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
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