I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
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