that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
