Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
